I put my gift under the tree and prayed. By nine, three friends were fighting over it.

Ellen's hand skipped past a bath set that everybody could tell was a bath set and picked up my slim green box with the velvet bow. It was only turn two of our book club's swap at Deb's.

Then Marcy, who says sorry to furniture, stole it from Ellen. My own sister stole it from Marcy, which I'll bring up every Thanksgiving for the rest of my life.

The third steal freezes a gift for good. So Bonnie crossed the room in her wool socks and plucked it out of my sister's hands.

The whole room booed, and I laughed so hard I snorted. A year earlier, in that same living room, Bonnie took the most embarrassing photo of my life.

The night I won bingo and lost

Bonnie runs our swap like a casino. Every January she deals out bingo cards, and every square is a gift we swore we loved, then regifted, like the bath set, the fuzzy socks, the mug and the candle.

That year I needed the candle square, and the box in my lap was exactly candle-shaped. I tore the paper, saw cedar and fig in a frosted jar, and thought, wow, whoever picked this has my exact taste. So I threw both arms up and yelled “BINGO!” so loud Deb's husband came running in from the garage.

Nobody clapped. The room went so quiet you could hear the cheese ball sweat, and on the couch, Deb had both hands over her mouth.

I'd driven all over Portland for that jar. Ellen cracked up, Bonnie already had her phone out, and my face burned the whole drive home.

That night, I added it up. Deb got my candle, Bonnie got my socks with wine glasses on them, and my sister got my “We Read Books and Drink Wine” mug. Every one was a square on Bonnie's card.

I thought I was the thoughtful friend, but to them I was the supplier.

So for Marcy's birthday, I stood in the candle aisle at Target for twenty minutes, too scared to touch anything, and then handed her a twenty-dollar bill. “Oh, cash! Fun!” she said, in the voice you use for a kid's drawing.

Your friends are lying to you too, and they're sweet about it

Has a friend ever thanked you with three exclamation points? Check her shelf at Easter. If the candle you gave her still has a white wick, it's waiting for somebody else. Mine came back to me in front of the whole room. Then I looked up the numbers.

The woman who took the photo knew exactly why

Bonnie ran a gift shop on Hawthorne for nineteen years, so in March I bribed her with coffee and asked for the ugly truth.

“Your candle was lovely,” she said. “That's the trouble. Everything on my card is lovely, and anybody could have given it. Deb saw a candle, not you, and she already has nine.”

“So what do people actually keep?”

“The thing they grab every week without thinking. Nobody has ever regifted a can opener, Lisa, because the first time they use it, it's theirs.” She stirred her coffee. “It's not your taste, hon. It's the square.”

One question sank every safe gift I'd tried

She wrote one question on her napkin: “Will they still be using it next January?”

Cash can't end up on Bonnie's card. But Marcy told me she spent my twenty on paper towels.

The tumbler I gave Ellen has her initials, so it can't be regifted. It's still in its box on top of her fridge.

The nice bottle I brought for Deb's birthday got opened, at least. Then Deb thanked Marcy for it, and by Sunday it was in the recycling.

Bonnie pointed her spoon at me. “What do we do every single month, Lisa?”

“We read half the book and drink Deb's white wine,” I said, “then call it bathwater by chapter three.”

“So give them the thing they'll use every time they open a bottle. Then it can never end up on my card.”

The gift Bonnie threatened to put on her card

I almost laughed, because I figured every wine gadget was a square too, dead in some junk drawer. But the one I found lives in the freezer. It's a rod of 304 food-grade stainless steel that slides into the open bottle, and you pour straight through the clear spout on top. You grab it for every bottle, so it's a can opener for wine people.

A week later, Bonnie turned it over like she was pricing it for her old shop. “So it's a fancy ice cube?”

“It's steel, not ice, so nothing melts. It cools the wine from the inside out, so an open bottle that's warmed up is back at serving temperature in 10 to 15 minutes.”

“And will my second glass still be cold by chapter three?”

“It keeps what you pour cold for up to three hours. That's longer than we've ever talked about a book.”

“Prove it, or it goes on my card.”

So in April I hosted. The rod went into my freezer for the first time at six, and at seven I opened a pinot grigio and slid it in. At a quarter past eight, Bonnie poured her own second glass through the spout without a drip. Nobody breathed while she sipped, and then she stared at the glass like it had cheated at bingo.

“Huh. It's still cold.”

From Bonnie, that's a standing ovation.

It's made by Lindner & Co and comes as a pair. I kept one, and Deb took the other home that night, which I don't remember offering.

See how it works →

The next January, the room went quiet again

That's what was in the green box: a second pair, just for the swap. But when Ellen peeled back one end of the paper, nobody said a word, and my stomach dropped, because I was sure I'd just handed Bonnie her next square.

Then Ellen looked at the coffee table, where Deb's pinot grigio stood with a clear spout sticking out.

“Oh, you're kidding,” she said. “It's Deb's thing!”

Nobody saw a gadget. They saw nine months of cold second glasses at Deb's.

“Don't look at me,” Deb said, and put her hand over the spout. “Mine stays right here.” She'd opened that bottle at seven, and at almost nine, the glass I poured was still cold.

That's when the stealing started. I'd prayed for somebody to keep it, but I forgot to pray for manners. Bonnie flipped her bingo card over, drew a brand-new square with a skinny bottle and a spout, and wrote NEVER REGIFTED under it. I didn't win bingo that night, and I've never been happier to lose.

Our swap wasn't the only one that ended in a fight. 4.8/5 · 370 reviews:

People fought over the wine cooler at the Christmas gift game. Very popular 🥂

Birgitta P.

This wine chilling stick isn't just functional, it's also very stylish. It fits perfectly with my wine collection, and I use it every time I open a bottle. 5 stars!

Sarah Pedersen

Gave them away as Christmas presents and have been told they were great.

Marie K.

If you're the gift friend, here's what I'd do

Get the pair, keep one in your freezer so you know what you're giving, and wrap the other for the friend who always brings the wine. If it doesn't earn its spot, you have 30 days to get your money back.

Christmas is less than three months away, and holiday swaps start even sooner. Order now so you can test yours on your own Bonnie before you wrap anything.

This year, put the box everybody fights over under the tree.

Give the one they'll fight over →

Lisa

This is a dramatized story based on experiences customers have shared with us. Names and details are illustrative. The reviews above are real, unedited customer reviews.